Last night as is my habit, headed into the city to drink my fill on the lower east side.
And drink i did with usual enthusiasm and abandon.
The bar where i start is quiet and i know a few locals. Cam the machinist, George the wise guy and Clive, a veteran who recently threw out his back.
A cute bar maid by the name Brook serves the beer and when i drink draft i have a pounding headache in the morning. Last night i drank draft.
The last four Fridays i have blacked out the second half of the evening. Last night the police found me at a train station close to a junior college i use to attend, twenty or so years ago.
They said they wanted to help me detoxify but i preferred to go home. They were quite firm but not aggressive or abusive and i too was polite. They gave me a $173 ticket for not having a ticket and called a cab.
A night on the cheap turned out to be expensive.
The good news is i didn’t wet my bed, breaking my streak at three.
This morning i went for a walk, bought a coffee and a muffin at Tim Horton's, made soup for my beautiful girlfriend and pondered my black out experiences.
A psychotic split is how i have heard it described,
and it seem to be affiliated with trauma
and where do i go when i’m not here,
if i can’t recall where i was…was i really there…
bring a camera
deeper and deeper into my head exploring regions all together unknown and unfashionable…and even unintelligible…
i am less than present…
“all neurosis is vanity but that too will be misunderstood.”
So said a famous person in the helping profession
To develop and acknowledge all aspects of yourself would be a worth while pursuit…and this could lead to more narcissism. Over…http://in.integralinstitute.org/naked.aspx
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